One single mother’s tragic tale of having to disguise her gender reminds us of the Disney classic ‘Mulan’, where the heroine was fighting for honor in ‘a man’s world out there’. Pakistani lady Farheen Ishtiaq’s story further highlights the need for a safe society for women.
The forty-one-year-old single mother is originally from Karachi and runs a shop in Lahore. In order to avoid harassment, she runs her corner store dressed as a man.
She is aware of the harassment women encounter in Anarkali Bazaar. She has seen it all, from menacing stares to physical altercations. Its no wonder then that she disguises herself as a man in order to earn a living for her nine-year-old daughter Rida.
Her name is farheen. She is running her own shop in Anarkali Bazar lahore. She has to dress up like a man to ensure safety and to avoid inconvenience. She has been living in lahore since 9 years and growing up her daughter. An inspiration for our generation. Hats off. ❣️ pic.twitter.com/PQ169REXbk
— Zain Ul Hassan (@zainmalik_says) February 11, 2020
ALSO READ
Disney’s “Mulan” Goes Full Blown Action Movie in New Trailer [Video]
Modern-day Mulan
So how did this single mother end up here? It all started when she married a man of her choice and her parents cut her off.
“In 2010, I chose to get married to someone who was not the same ethnicity as me as and my parents did not accept it. It was an extremely difficult time.”
Things got worse. Ehile Farheen was pregnant, her husband left her. With a complicated birth at one point, she feared her daughter would end up being orphaned.
“I gave birth at a hospital without any family support. I had to have an operation done and I told the doctors, ‘if I die, please give my daughter to my parents’.”
Since the birth of her daughter, Farheen has been solely focused on her little girl. She wants a better life for Rida. For a while, that even meant sending her daughter away to Multan to be cared for by a friend.
“My only focus was to provide for her and give her a better life than what I had.”
At least some good came out of this and Farheen’s parents accepted Rida as their granddaughter and cared for her.
“I told them that if they no longer want me as a daughter it is fine but they should not cut connections with their granddaughter and they kept her for four years.”
The move to Lahore
Meanwhile, Farheen saved up money and later the mother-daughter moved to Lahore.
“Someone told me that there is a girl’s hostel in Lahore where I could safely live with my daughter and work at the same time and I decided to go there.”
This ‘modern-day Mulan’ soon discovered that she was surrounded by male-dominated public places. As a female hawker selling snacks, Farheen was constantly harassed and discouraged.
Since quitting was not an option, Farheen disguised herself as a man with the alias ‘Ali’.
“The city was new and I found it difficult to adjust. I was also living and working around Anarkali Bazaar … The place is such that a woman cannot do so in peace.”
ALSO READ
LUMS Under Fire For Not Taking Action Against Professor over Sexual Harassment
Farheen should not have to be ‘Ali’, in order to provide for her child and keep her honor. Even as a shop owner, Farheen was still struggling with debt. In a bid to help her, someone placed her story on social media and now we all know of her legendary tale.
“I could work and keep my daughter beside me and I never want to separate from her again.”
Even after centuries, its sad that women still face the same battles for safety and dignity in a ‘civilized world’.
via DESIBlitz
