When it comes to conspiracy theories, most of them can be easily dismissed by logic and sound reasoning. But even then, people do love to share and enjoy them all around the world, even if that means staying up at night thinking Bloody Mary is standing in front of your mirror.
Now as a Pakistani, we have our own zany brand of conspiracy theories that are enough to make Alex Jones blush. Generally, Pakistani conspiracy theories are not that easy to negate because:
- Almost all of them have something to do with Satan,
- They have no head or tail,
- They have been passed down for generations.
Is it a good thing though, to entertain these conspiracy theories? Researchers who have studied this subject are of the view that believing in these conspiracies can be traumatizing, psychologically damaging and paranoia-inducing.
Even with those findings out there, most adults enjoy telling these tales to youngsters with pride, not even thinking about the harmful effects those can have on a youngster’s brain.
Lets take a look at some of the most ridiculous conspiracy theories and old wives’ tale that are unique to Pakistani society.
Pichhal Peri is probably the most popular amongst desis; especially men. The reason behind this myth is that it tells us of a supernatural being, who targets men by transforming herself into a beautiful goddess-like figure.
She can transform anything but her feet, which point backward for some reason. In most cases, legends say that she appears to be stranded on an empty roadside, probably looking for help. Which she very conveniently gets from men who are alone.
We are yet to uncover what her motives are, since most of the victims ‘successfully escape her grasp.’ Or we could never know of victims that did not escape because they’re….gone?
Ok that got too depressing too quick.Let’s move on.
If you aren’t able to forget the image of Pichhal Peri, don’t worry! We are moving to something lighter.
Most elders might have stopped you from playing with scissors. We are told from a young age that if you use scissors in the air, it ‘will cause your parents to fight’.
Well that sounds nice, given every child has done that out of curiosity, and every parent has fought at least once.
Seems like parents have long been blaming kids for their fights. If that’s not traumatizing, I don’t know what is!
Leaving Your Shoes Upside Down
As kids, we’d go to our grandparents’ place and play amongst our cousins. And of course, we’d play games. I bet everyone knows how our shoes became a constant obstacle in our ‘Baraf Paani‘ battles.
One moment we’d be chasing after people or running away from them. And the second moment, we’d always hear an elderly voice bellow at us to put the shoes upright.
An irritated child, who just wants to play, might question why it is so important to keep shoes all prim and proper. Well, apparently our elders had ‘reasons’ for that. They include:
- Someone in the family will end up having a fight.
- It is disrespectful to God.
If someone’s lying down in your way, you must NEVER cross the path by skipping or jumping over them! Elders say it will stop your growth… height-wise.
Seems like your cells are as offended as the person lying down because, soon as you cross them, your tissues are like
‘No more cells for you’.
Absurd? Well tell that to the people!
If you have ever worn one shoe and walked even a single step trying to find the other one, we have bad news for you. Turns out if you do that, you’ll end up with seven daughters…
I don’t know about you, but it does not sound too bad though (we kid).
Have some guests coming to your place that you don’t like? Do these guests spend hours at your place? No problem. All you have to do is put some salt behind them, and they’ll leave as soon as the salt starts its magical work.
We are yet to find someone who has tried this with successful results. Is no one strong enough to test this theory out?
Nothing scares kids (and adults) more than good ol’ satan and/or Jinn. And for that reason, a lot of conspiracy theories in the desi community are dedicated towards these evil beings.
Here are a few things that can invoke Shaitaan’s presence in your life;
- Clapping your hands gives birth to a baby satan (wait, what?),
- Swinging your legs causes the devil to swing on them (but everyone loves swings, no?).
- Women shouldn’t go out with open and or wet hair, because jinn will attach itself to her.
- If you don’t cover your mouth while yawning, satan enters it and makes a house in your stomach (hahahahaha)
Ok, we get it. Stay away from Shaitaan mardood.
The Karsaz Bride
Although this conspiracy has died down, almost a decade ago it was the tale that most peeps believed in.
A jinn, dressed up as a bride, could stop cars at Karsaz in Karachi. Upon reaching this lady in red (who seemed like a damsel in distress), people were shocked when they found a dead body, with maggots all over the corpse’s face.
If you think you can run away from her in your car, you’re wrong! She has Vin-Diesel-level skills in catching up with you!
To end it all, we have the father of all conspiracy theories for you! If anything is ever going wrong in your life just remember it as a “Yahoodi sazish” and/or Indian propaganda.
So there you have it. These 9 Pakistani conspiracy theories that are too preposterous to exist but yet they do. For poking fun or for keeping kids in check, that’s entirely up to you.
Have more conspiracy theories to add to this list? Let us know!